I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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