are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
