Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
