Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
