Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
you made out with another girl for some wings
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
