Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
