On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
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