sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
