Well apparently he's into motor boating.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
