I molested 6 butterflies tonight
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
