nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
