We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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