all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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