So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
