i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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