we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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