Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
