shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
