just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
