i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
