should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
