Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
you never un-have a 4some
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
