How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
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