im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Randomize
