i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Randomize
