My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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