It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Randomize
