Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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