I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
