If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
