At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
