omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
