Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
