okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
