i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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