I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
