its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
i need some magic done to my vagina
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Randomize
