I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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