If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
