I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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