More tranny stories later!
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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