Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
