it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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