Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I think i peed on brittanys purse
its not stalking. its research.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Randomize
