I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
