I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
