ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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