Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
