So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
