Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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